I would like to start off with an experience I had:
In Jr. High I had a teacher who would often tell us crazy young teenagers to stop goofing off, or to pay attention, or to stop talking (which was usually what she said to me obviously). We would always say an off the cuff “sorry” but sure enough ten minutes later she would have to tell us again to settle down or to be quiet. I remember one day after she had told a student to be quiet for the third or fourth time that day and he apologized for the third or fourth time she said: “do you even mean that?” he looked at her confused and said “yeah” to which she replied “why do you keep doing it then?” she went on to explain to us that sorry meant that we regretted what we had done, that “sorry” isn’t a word you can say off-the-cuff, you need to mean it. A lot of the things she said were things we had heard before but I still remember that experience because it really changed my outlook on the word “sorry” and to appreciate it.
Today I have been asked to speak on repentance.
First I’d like you to consider how you would define the word repentance and then how you repent. For me, each night as I said my prayers I would apologize for mistakes I made that day like gossiping about someone or arguing with my parents or whatever it might have been and then I figured that was good. It wasn’t until about a year and a half ago that I realized that this simple process wasn’t really repentance. I was at a summer BYU devotional and the speaker was Brad Wilcox, his talk was entitled His Grace is Sufficient. This talk struck me like none other has in my life and I highly recommend it. I will come back to this talk a couple of times because this is how I really began to appreciate and understand repentance as not just an apology off-the-cuff with little or no backing behind it but rather an intent to change.
Elder Christofferson, in his talk The Divine Gift of Repentance, explained what I had been missing with just the simple apologies in my nightly prayers, he said: "Repentance means striving to change. It would mock the Savior's suffering in the Garden of Gethsemane and on the cross for us to expect that He should transorm us into angelic beings with no real effort on our part. Rather, we seek His grace to complement and reward our most diligent efforts. Perhaps as much as praying for mercy, we should pray for time and opportunity to work and strive and overcome. Surely the Lord smiles upon one who desires to come to judgment worthily, who resolutely labors day by day to replace weakness with strength."
Often I think we forget the difference between apologizing and repenting. The Miriam-Webster dictionary defines apologizing as "an admission of error or discourtesy accompanied by an expression of regret” on the other hand repenting is defined as “a change to one’s mind, to feel regret or contrition and to turn from sin and dedicate oneself to the amendment of one’s life.” In the prayers I mentioned earlier, I often did feel regret for mistakes that I had made but I was missing the main part of repentance: the change of mind, the turning of my heart and will to God.
True repentance is often a difficult process and it will take time, but that is why we are here on this earth: to learn how to repent of our sins and to continually become more and more Christ-like so that we may dwell in His Kingdom. Don’t allow yourself to become discouraged by the mistakes you have made but rather, be inspired by them. There will of course be times when you find yourself having to repent for the same mistake more than once. But the difference is that each time you repent, make a conscious effort to not make that mistake again. Write down the things you are trying to work on if it helps you remember throughout the day. It can be discouraging to make the same mistake over and over again, but Elder Christofferson assures us that: “Real repentance, real change may require repeated attempts, but there is something refining and holy in such striving.” Never think you are undeserving of the cleanliness that the atonement can bring to you. “Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.” God will help us turn our weaknesses into strengths as he sees us continually striving to humble ourselves and come unto him. An old Chinese proverb says “a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step,” Just keep trying. No matter how far you have walked in the wrong direction, because of the incredible gift of the atonement you can turn around. It isn’t where we are on the path that is important; it’s which way we are walking. Ezekiel tells us that no matter how righteous someone is his righteousness will not deliver him in the day of his transgression, “As for the wickedness of the wicked, he shall not fall thereby in the day that he turneth from his wickedness.”
I love to ice skate. I’m not very good at it and when I am learning a new spin or a new jump I often will fall but with ice skating I know I can get back up and try again, that each time I try something new even if I fall I’m getting closer to nailing it. My coach never told me after falling down that I wasn’t worthy to get up and try again. I was learning. The important thing was that I was applying her corrections and working hard. The same is with repentance. Elder Holland explained: “Like thieves in the night, unwelcome thoughts can and do seek entrance to our minds. But we don’t have to throw open the door, serve them tea and crumpets, and then tell them where the silverware is kept! Throw the rascals out!” When you fall down, don’t quit. Get back up and try again. On that same note, returning back to the analogy of ice skating, when someone falls as they learn a new trick they don’t just lay down on the ice and act like they meant to fall, that they are perfectly content and relaxed as they lay on the cold hard surface. With sin, don’t allow yourself to become comfortable in a fallen state, don’t give up on the ultimate goal of living in the celestial kingdom just because you have fallen so many times you don’t know what the trick even looks like anymore. Ask the coach, ask the skaters around you to demonstrate. Also, don’t rationalize what you are doing to get out of repenting. President Spencer W. Kimball said, “Rationalizing is the enemy to repentance. Rationalizing is the bringing of ideals down to the level of one’s conduct but repentance is the bringing of one’s conduct up to the level of his ideals.” Alma 42:30 says: “Do not endeavor to excuse yourself in the least point because of your sins, by denying the justice of God; but do let the justice of God, and his mercy, and his long-suffering have full sway in your heart; and let it bring you down to the dust of humility.”
So now that I’ve covered what repentance is, I’d like to talk about why it is so important.
Justice requires immediate perfection, but because Christ paid our debt to justice in full he can forgive what justice can't. By repenting, we are not satisfying the demands of justice even remotely, but rather, we are showing appreciation for Christ's atonement.
Brad Wilcox uses the analogy of a child practicing the piano to demonstrate this concept. "Christ’s arrangement with us is similar to a mom providing music lessons for her child. Mom pays the piano teacher. Because Mom pays the debt in full, she can turn to her child and ask for something. What is it? Practice! Does the child’s practice pay the piano teacher? No. Does the child’s practice repay Mom for paying the piano teacher? No. Practicing is how the child shows appreciation for Mom’s incredible gift. It is how he takes advantage of the amazing opportunity Mom is giving him to live his life at a higher level. Mom’s joy is found not in getting repaid but in seeing her gift used—seeing her child improve. And so she continues to call for practice, practice, practice.
If the child sees Mom’s requirement of practice as being too overbearing, (“Gosh, Mom, why do I need to practice? None of the other kids have to practice! I’m just going to be a professional baseball player anyway!”) Perhaps it is because he doesn’t yet see with mom’s eyes. He doesn’t see how much better his life could be if he would choose to live on a higher plane.”
True repentance can be very difficult. It’s not easy to give up the things of the world and just like the child who complains about the worthlessness of practicing the piano, some things we have been commanded to avoid or difficult things we are asked to do may not make sense to us at first but as Brother Wilcox later suggests, perhaps this means that we do not yet see through Christ’s eyes.
The natural man inside each of us often has so much pride that we have a hard time taking correction. We become embarrassed or defensive and often miss the love that is behind such a correction. In one of my favorite books The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch he tells an experience he had when he was 9 years old playing on a youth football team. There was one practice where his coach just corrected him again and again and again, afterwards an assistant coach came up to Randy and said “Coach Graham rode you pretty hard didn’t he?” when Randy said “yeah” the assistant coach said “that’s a good thing, when you’re screwing up and nobody’s saying anything anymore that means they gave up.” Those that correct you are the ones that truly love you. Christ not only shows his love by calling us to repentance but by giving us the option in the first place through his infinite atonement. The adversary would tell you to turn away from such an amazing gift like this because it’ll make life less enjoyable but I testify with Elder Christofferson that repentance “points us to freedom, confidence, and peace. Rather than interrupting the celebration, the gift of repentance is the cause for true celebration.”
I testify that wickedness never was happiness; that true happiness comes from following Christ. That the joy and peace repentance brings is real and is far better and deeper than anything the adversary can tempt you with. I am excited to share the reason for my happiness with the people of Spain. I’m grateful for all of your love and support and your examples throughout my life.
I would like to close with Moroni’s words: “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the sons of God; that when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure.”
